You Oughta Be in Pictures ****
- Roger Kay
- May 22
- 2 min read

A director’s chair, script and drinks table await us at this Brighton Fringe production of You Oughta Be in Pictures. Taking to the stage, Polis Loizou introduces the concept of the show to us – as if we are to receive a lecture or presentation.
Loizou, a former film student, has uncovered footage from an actor’s audition in Hollywood. Yet, we are not shown any segment of this – instead, he will re-enact the unseen aspect of the audition, the words and some of the assumed actions of the casting director, Laszlo Parker. The audience has to imagine the actor’s part of dialogue. If this sounds a stretch, or unnecessary, the reason for this becomes disturbingly clear.
Loizou’s introduction seamlessly gives way to Parker. His physicality changes, and along with a clipped American accent, we are transported to Hollywood. But it’s not all glamour.
Parker is auditioning a young, God-fearing man, who has travelled from the backwaters of Ohio to Tinseltown, following his dreams. A casting opportunity has apparently arisen following the unexpected death of another young actor, the details of which are difficult to hear.
What unfolds is a study in power and exploitation. Parker possesses all the authority and control; the actor has none. Parker makes pointed and frequent references to the actor’s physique and attractiveness. In slices, he reveals the young man’s vulnerability; he is alone in the city, has almost no family and needs work.
Parker prowls the stage, stalking him, his physicality resembling a tiger. He plies the actor with alcohol and manipulates him into removing his clothing. Parker continues to control the scene, oscillating between charm and impatience, before it takes on a particularly dark and troubling turn.
The production might easily be a forerunner of the #MeToo movement: a victim who has no voice, an entitled predator who enjoys and is shielded by institutional protection. There are also strong shades of James Ellroy’s L.A. Confidential and allegorical to Harvey Weinstein here – but stories of the “casting couch” are as old as time. The young man is consumed and discarded by a systems that regards aspiration as a commodity. This particular tale may depict real events, but as Loizou says “Reality is up for grabs”, an observation on both filmmaking and the stories societies choose to believe.
Loizou’s performance is powerful, chilling and pitch perfect. He is a charismatic and engaging storyteller and recreates the bygone Hollywood era adeptly. There may be an opportunity for tightening the staging and direction, but this is a very fine production.
While the era may be bygone, You Oughta Be in Pictures shines a light on abuses that are still depressingly prevalent; the relevance of the production remains painfully stark.




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